Is your head cold? Is your style colder?
Slap this Official Roaring Buttholes Turbo Beanie on your dome and instantly gain +3 to stage presence, +5 to chaotic energy, and -2 to common sense. It’s snug, form-fitting, and vaguely threatening to baristas. Whether you’re headbanging, napping in a merch bin, or hiding from mall security, this beanie does the job – and looks unreasonably good doing it.
• 100% Turbo Acrylic, because Regular Acrylic just couldn’t handle the noise
• 12″ (30 cm) of pure cranial confidence
• Hypoallergenic – won’t trigger your scalp or your ex
• Unisex style, because fart jokes transcend gender
• Hand washable (just like your sins)
• Blank product sourced from Vietnam, Bangladesh, or the Republic of Korea—blessed by at least one cursed roadie before shipping
Perfect for winter gigs, dumpster dives, and emotionally complex drum solos. Put it on. Embrace the warmth. Fear nothing.
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
Age restrictions: For adults
EU Warranty: 2 years
Other compliance information: Meets the lead, cadmium, phthalates and bisphenols level requirements.
In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Longboat Interactive and SINDEN VENTURES LIMITED ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at [email protected].
